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The Singapore sling
“Ladies and gentlemen, this is a special announcement. The trafficking of drugs into Singapore is a serious offence and carries a mandatory death penalty.” As if a special announcement on our Air Asia flight from Phuket to Singapore was not sufficient, the message was repeated on the immigration card. “Warning: Death for drug traffickers under Singapore law.” With such explicit cautions we have also avoided spitting or chewing gum in public, and Marty took the precaution of having his hair cut, fearing that any long flowing locks touching his collar would still be a summary offence as it was in the sixties.
The drug trafficking welcome was about as friendly as the staff at the famous Raffles Hotel where we stopped yesterday for the legendary, and obligatory, Singapore Sling. The hotel itself is rather grand affair named after Sir Stanford Raffles, the founder of Singapore, and was declared a national monument in 1987. It bills itself as the jewel in the crown of the country’s hospitality industry, renowned and loved for its inimitable style and unsurpassed excellence in service and facilities. But, we have noted before that those who flatter themselves with such vain recommendations are usually least qualified to do so. Those working in the famed Long Bar (albeit recreated in a new wing of the hotel, build in 1991) looked bored and, without exception, sullen, as though they did not want to be there. Had Kaelene not disturbed their indifferent air and asked what we needed to do to be served we could have died of thirst, or old age. Perhaps the lack of interest was an affectation, just as it is, seemingly, the way the floor is littered with the husks of unshelled peanuts, large boxes of which are on each of table. The Long Bar tradition of dropping debris on the floor must still be a very chic thing to do.
It would, though, be unfair to judge this city too harshly. We took a ride on the Singapore Airlines Hop-On bus, which for $S12 ($NZ 14) or free for Singapore Airlines passengers, allows a day of hop-on, hop-off travelling on two routes. One stops almost directly outside our hotel and runs through parks and gardens, down Orchard Road, the main shopping area, around Little India, then through the Marina Bay area, on to Chinatown and Clarke Quay, a trendy bar area on the river front, and then back home. The other route does a circuit of the city and then to Sentosa Island.
These services are excellent, regular, on-time and, at around one seventh of the price, leave the Dubai hop-on hop-off service for dead. They provide a good overview of a city which is not as sterile as often portrayed; it is leafy and green, and while downtown buildings and the shopping malls are ultra-modern, there are still the markets and ethnic areas that retain the charm, smells and allure of old Asia. The architecture in the backstreets of Little India is quite similar to Phuket and a real treasure.
Not to be missed is a ride on the Singapore Flyer, the local equivalent of the London Eye; it is an observation wheel which carries passenger in sixteen-ton capsules to a height of 165 metres (or 42 stories) and provides views across the city and on to Malaysia in the North and the Indonesian Islands in the South-East. The half-hour ride, complete with commentary, is apparently a moving centrestage of experiences we will never forget. What we won’t forget is the spa in the Flyer shopping centre where people can be treated, at $S38, to having "doctor fishes" from Turkey help promote blood circulation, ease psoriasis and minor eczema, lighten scars, relieve stress and smoothen skin. We watched as customers sat in the spa window with feet in tanks of water while fish, about three inches long, nibbled at their legs.
As for unsurpassed excellence in service, it would be hard to beat the Hard Rock Café where, universally, staff are bubbly, friendly and engaging, or even at Phuket airport where the sandwishes from their bekery are sublime. Raffles could really learn a thing or two.