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Cockles and Mussels, Alive, Alive O
To New Zealanders there is something insufferable about the English rugby team which is perfectly illustrated by the example of the time they performed a victory lap at Twickenham after drawing a match it was expected they would lose to the All Blacks. A draw, it seemed, was tantamount to a win. It was with some relief therefore that, after the British and Irish Lions won the last test on Saturday but lost the series against the Springboks, the Lions’ captain rejected the claim of the English TV interviewer that it could be considered they had actually won the series on moral grounds. The proposition was that, despite losing two tests to one, they had scored more tries and scored more points overall in the three games, and would certainly have won the second test had Schalk Burger been sent off rather than yellow-carded for eye gouging. Thankfully the captain, an Irishman, replied that honours boards don’t record moral victories, and that losses are losses no matter how you dress them up.
On the subject of honours boards, not all of Kaelene’s family origins are of the Irish sheep-stealing kind. There are those from the South of England, wholesome people with a proud tradition of rescuing people from the sea and building lighthouses, and that is how we found ourselves at the Royal National Lifeboat Institution Museum on the stony beach at Eastbourne. From even earlier than 1900 a number of the Boniface family were involved with the coastguard and the museum has a fine collection of memorabilia, photos and newspaper clippings, and details of boats rescued and lives saved off what must be a wild coast at times.
As well as rescuing people, the family had a pub, the Alexandra Arms, and we went there expecting lunch but settled for a beer for the passenger and soft drink for the driver. Then on to St Mary’s the Virgin Church, the family’s parish which dates back to the twelfth century, and then the Ocklynge cemetery where some are buried.
Eastbourne is a classic English seaside town, but clearly a favourite of the older set, with motorized wheelchairs and scooters the transportation of choice. On the promenade are a number of grand, pristine, white hotels and guest houses and a pier which juts out into the sea, at its end a gift shop and tearooms. By contrast, the pier at Brighton has amusement arcades and sideshow rides and along its beach, bars and cafes instead of a rotunda for the local brass band’s regular concerts.
On a day that reached 28 degrees and with the top down in the Merc, SatNave Ken could have had his revenge for our repeatedly ignoring his directional instructions by taking us over the edge at Beachy Head, the highest chalk sea cliff in the UK at over 500 feet, and apparently the most popular suicide spot in the country. There is little there by way of barriers to prevent jumpers, aside from a cruising chaplaincy service and a sign that says it’s not too late to phone a counselor, both of which seems to have worked because the number of suicides has decreased from around 20 per year to only seven in 2006. In May this year a young couple whose son had died of meningitis jumped carrying the body of the boy and a bag of his toys. Crosses along the cliff top present a haunting image.
From there to Brighton is a short distance, past a sign warning motorists to watch out for badgers and along another pebble beach where stalls sell cockles and mussels, jellied eel, mackerel pate, and crab sandwiches. And fresh fruit, locally caught!
A sign on the Brighton Pier cautions against feeding birds, warning that they become aggressive in search of food. And so they do, a woman ahead of us had her food snatched from her hand by a seagull swooping from behind. Not only was she startled, but she was left with a bleeding hand such was the ferocity of the grab. As for us, we left and returned to London for a grandstand seat in the Moodie’s living room with strawberries and cream for the Wimbledon final. Thankfully the interviewer didn’t ask the losing Andy Roddick whether he scored a moral victory on the basis that he broke Roger Federer’s serve two games to one.