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Wanneroo?
Perhaps these people think differently to us, it cannot be they are less crude, but the suburban name Wanneroo seemed to invite the addition of a further consonant, particularly when, on some highway road signs its name immediately precedes that of Innaloo. It may have been just a lack of Aussie imagination but we just couldn’t believe that some wag would not have defaced the signs, so it was something of a relief to discover, on Friday, a “t” carefully appended to the end of Wanneroo on one such sign. It may have been done to indulge our amusement, for the very next day The West Australian carried a photograph of a fast food store, The Red Rooster, with the “s” reported as having apparently been removed by a strong gust of wind.
In other Australian observations we have been bemused by the WA Police Minister, a chap called Rob Johnson who is described as being passionately in favour of hanging and flogging (including by the victims’ families) of those who infringe the laws. In a 2006 interview he told The Sunday Times that serious offenders should be given a lethal injection or the electric chair. Not confining himself to matters of criminal justice, earlier he had told the State Parliament that “it was narrow-minded to say that we shouldn’t be exploiting women. Look, it’s going to happen anyway,” he explained.
Not surprisingly he is commonly in the news, most recently over the confiscation of a Lamborghini belonging to a local doctor of Sri Lankan origin. The good doctor took his car in for servicing and the mechanic took it for an unauthorized spin, only to be clocked at 160kph, resulting in the car being impounded for a month under anti-hoon legislation. Defending the seizure and impoundment against seemingly logical arguments that the doctor was an innocent party in the matter, an unperturbed Minister told the media that the doctor was wealthy enough to hire another car to do his rounds and then added fuel to the fire by saying that the car had been turned into a deadly weapon by being driven at such high speeds and needed to be off the road.
Refreshingly, The West Australian summarised Johnson’s statement as being so mind-numbingly stupid that it almost called for “dumb animal” protection measures, then adding that it hardly matters because this animal (Johnson) appears to be half rhinoceros and half duck. The article continues that Johnson sails on blissfully unaffected, with at least half the population thinking he is the right man to be Police Minister. “Maybe it’s true that people get the politicians they deserve,” the article concluded.
Meanwhile, our other keen interest, Richard Pennicuik, the tree man of Thornlie, remains perched up the gum tree outside his house after being forced under the threat of a hefty fine by the local council to remove a platform he had built in its branches. After sixty-something days up the tree Pennicuik admits his protest is “sheer stupidity” but says that he still won’t be coming down. Sadly, it seems, there has been something of a backlash against his action. “I’ve been called a mongrel and a c—ksucker” and “people say things like they’ll strangle me if a branch falls down and hits someone,” he told Perth Now. “I’m becoming more and more disappointed in the human race.” The council is now threatening to prosecute if Pennicuik doesn’t come down soon.
As for us, Kaelene has been busy with Seath and Nicole finalising planning details for the new house, and it has been revealing. Developers sell these land and house packages, with the houses built to a standard formula, all of which seem to be an attractive deal particularly as they allow a number of variable or additional options. And that is where the rot sets in; the charge for any non-standard items is rocketed in and, of course, the building company won’t let in anyone but their own contactors. For example, it costs an additional $A130 per light for installing small ceiling downlights, with the purchaser additionally having to supply the fittings, and a house-lot of non-standard window blinds an further $3,000. For some inexplicable reason, the installation of larger kitchen tiles is more expensive that smaller ones even though it would appear they take less effort to lay, and then the cost of a small bar, about one metre in length, another $3000. $30,000 could be added to the cost of a house in less than the blink of an eye.
There was something we missed on Australia day and that was Vegemite wrestling. Described as time-honoured and one of the more unusual activities to mark the day, women in bikinis wrestled in the concentrated yeast extract at Dr Pong’s Pub in Sydney. It is curious thing that those people in Sydney somehow regard Western Australians as feral.