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How bizarre

State elections in Tasmania and South Australia this weekend should have sent a clear message to Labour Prime Minister Kevin Rudd that his government is in deep trouble as the Federal elections loom later in the year. In both states there has been a double digit swing against Labour, even though the party may just hang on to power in each state. Although the results should sound serious alarm bells, it may already be too late. Rudd has the electoral appeal of New Zealand’s Phil Goff and Annette King combined and is sliding in the polls in a manner reminiscent of the last New Zealand Labour Government. It seems that once the momentum starts, it is difficult and often impossible to arrest.

The worst part is that Rudd is being blitzed by Liberal leader Tony Abbott who, quite frankly, is ghastly beyond description. Something like a Lockwood Smith on speed, Abbott has specialised in appearing as an ordinary Australian bloke; that is if the ordinary Australian bloke spends most of his life in Speedos.

Last weekend, in a soft, magazine-style television profile, Abbott was filmed, unnervingly creepily so, in the family swimming pool in his Speedos, one daughter piggybacking on his shoulders combing his hair rooster-style with her hands. Most often Abbott is in red and blue life-saver Speedos and on Sunday night, he was in a sort of mottle-patterned pair coming out of the water from a fund raising fun-swim somewhere to have another crack at Rudd.

This man has a winning formula; the pit-bull charm of the late Sir Robert Muldoon combined with a what appears a hapless but calculated honest-John approach, akin to that employed by Kiwi Prime Minister John Key who masks an ideological agenda with a plausible pretence that his policies are driven by common-sense and pragmatism.

There is a complacency among many who believe that Labour has an unassailable lead at the federal level and there seems little comprehension that a turning tide is hard to stem.

Almost as horrible as the prospect of Tony Abbott becoming Prime Minister is the thought that Australian cricketer Doug Bollinger may almost singlehandedly bowl out the New Zealand team twice in the first test at Wellington. It is one thing that Michael Clarke has overcome the Lara Bingle melodrama to score more than one hundred and sixty runs, but Bollinger epitomises everything that Kiwis find dislikeable about Australian sports’ stars. The only saving grace here is that the test series against New Zealand is not being shown on free to air television.

On what may be a lighter note, and this is true, is that there was an attempted carjacking just up the road from our home this week. While that may not be funny in itself, what provided the amusement was that three women concerned have been charged with attempting to steal a motor vehicle, their attempt being thwarted as none could drive a car with manual transmission. Local police have released a Neighbourhood Watch bulletin advising locals to drive with their windows up and doors locked.

Meanwhile, while the tree man of Thornlie, Richard Pennicuik, who has had more than his fair share of publicity already has drawn some unlikely support. British entrepreneur Richard Branson has been in town this week for some sort of fundraising effort and somehow the plight of Mr Pennicuik’s attempt to save the gum tree outside his house from being chopped down was drawn to Branson’s attention. To television cameras, Branson has wished Penniciuk the very best of luck, adding that he is a “bit of a tree hugger himself”. As for Pennicuik, he has been summoned to appear in the Armadale Magistrates’ Court in a fortnight and given that he now believes the local authority has no constitutional legitimacy, we will watch with interest.

Perhaps the last words should be about the hapless Lara Bingle, former fiancée of cricketer Michael Clarke and subject of the unauthorised release of a nude photo, allegedly by former boyfriend and Aussie Rules bad-boy Brendan Fevola. Bingle, it is reported, is poised to dump her newly appointed agent, Max Markson, after advice from her family that Markson had ruined her career and cheapened her image in the debacle. Fancy that, some might suggest that dumping Markson would be a little like closing the stable door after the horse has well and truly bolted.